We can certainly make fun of ourselves even in the most grievous sort of way. And why not? Call it self deprecating humor. If you have a problem with what I've just written then perhaps it's time for you to take a deep breath and move on. No need to complain to me since I’ll turn a deaf ear anyway. Pun absolutely intended. But do take the time and enjoy this little word play compilation of mine.
If a deaf person swears in ASL in front of a hearing police officer, will he get arrested?
If a blind person wears dark glasses, shouldn't a deaf person wear dark ear muffs, too?
A deaf person can do anything except here. Maybe over there, but not here.
If the I's have it, why cannot the ear's have it, too?
Can corns be deaf even though they have ears?
Why call them "hearing" aids when it should be "deaf" aids if it doesn't work for deaf people?
Is a deaf person an oralist if he moves his mouth while signing?
A deaf mime is a terrible thing. He's deaf, mute, and completely boxed in.
A happy deaf couple is when they can't hear each other snore.
If a deaf person signs while on an airplane, do they call it "flying fingers" ?
Name a sleep deprived deaf group. The students of Gallaudet University.
Does a deaf sleep walker sign?
What do you have when we put a deaf person, blind person, and a mute person together in a room? Incommunicado.
What's a deaf hazing? When new deaf members are forced to wear hearing aids.
Does tone deafness qualify as a disability?
What's a silent film? When you have a group of deaf people watching a movie in a theater.
If I say "to mah to" and you say "to may to", how does that work in ASL for tomato?
Can a deaf person whistle and enjoy it, too?
Is it bad manners to sign with a mouthful of food?
...until deaf do you apart.
One thing is certain, deaf, death, and taxes.
What do you get when you put a Deaf person, an oralist, a cochlear implant user,
a hearing aid user, and a deaf person together in a room? Trouble.
If deaf people can do anything, then where are they?
What do you call a pot user who is deaf? Stone deaf.
What's a native signer? A Deaf American Indian.
Are ASL signers allowed to swear in public?
What does the acronym A.S.L. mean to new freshmen at Gallaudet University? Am Signing Lousy.
Name an international sign language that everybody understands. "I'm choking!"
Why does a deaf person puts his finger on his nose to indicate the need to pee when it should be between the legs?
What is the significance about a deaf principal in his school office at a deaf school who is about to serve corporal punishment by paddling a deaf student? It's a place where nobody can hear you scream.
What would happen if deaf people didn't have opposable thumbs??
Whistle while you work means your hearing aid isn't working right.
If we have contact lens how come we don't have contact ears?
If we have palm readers then what the heck are lip readers?
What do you call a deaf elitist? A graduate student of Gallaudet University.
Isn’t there a law against signing and driving at the same time?
What’s the speed limit for signing? And where’s the slow lane?
Can deaf people sign ILYs to other deaf people while in a known gang territory of L.A.?
What do you call an angry deaf person? A dissedABLED person.
What are “cheat sheets” used by deaf students in a mainstreamed school? Sign language.
Why are there two signed versions for “shit” with one going in and the other one going out?
One’s a person, two’s a couple, three’s a deaf crowd who won’t leave a shopping mall food court at closing time.
What do you call a gorilla that knows sign language? Koko
If a deaf person swears in such an ungodly manner in ASL while a sign language interpreter interprets, who will get in trouble first?
Ever met a deaf stutterer?
Ever met a deaf person with Tourette Syndrome that stutters?
Has there ever been a sign language interpreter for deaf people with Tourette Syndrome that stutters?
Ever try and cuss in ASL while behind a television reporter doing a live interview in front of a news camera?
What’s a hearing aid favorite letter? Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
I sign, therefore I am. I write, therefore I may be. I speak, therefore I might not be.
What is a G.E.D.? An undergraduate college degree from a deaf college.
Words like “hearing impaired” are like crutches, they're supportive but nobody want to use them for long.
Why do they call it “manual alphabet”? Is it labor intensive or what?
Copyright by Kokonut Pundit, 2007.